Plain Truth: Cover up - the worst habit

Date: 01 November 2013   Read: 799

This is the worst habit among human beings to cover up the weakness and sins of their own families and friends. Many families in Africa are being destroyed because we normally conceal the truth about the bad behaviour of our friends and families even when we know that what they are doing is wrong.

I know of men who would not hesitate to take their roll-ons or spare-wheels to their sisters and in return their sisters would not divulge any information about these affairs to their sisters-in-laws. Why conceal this kind of information? It is all done in the name of cover-up and indeed in the name of love and wanting to protect your own as if your sister-in-law is not your own. Once somebody is married to your brother or sister, you should from thereon consider such a person a family member and not a stranger; and you should do everything in your power to love that person enough that you would not cover up for the weaknesses and sins of your blood brother or sister.

I know of churches and pastors who also cover up the sins and weakness of some members. If you are an elder of the church who is working and tithing in the church; you normally run away with murder because pastors often sweep cases of these people under the carpet. I know of elders who told their pastor after discovering his adulterous relationship that: “Mu-la-tshawe u a dzumbama, a wanala zwa sa vhe na mulandu” (free translation: You can do wrong things in private and try to conceal it; and if somebody discovers it …then what!). They should have at least reprimanded and disciplined their pastor for committing adultery. They concealed it because they are also leading the same kind of lifestyle. It is therefore imperative to not that concealing someone else’s sins and weakness; especially those that have to do with marriage and extra-marital affairs are not only dangerous but have contributed in a big way towards divorce. Do not allow your heart and house to become a heart and house which is the den of cheaters.

If you ask why people do what they do in covering other people’s weakness and sins, they cite among others the following reasons: (1) S(he) is family and therefore I must protect him/her; (2) I do not want to break their relationship whilst you are literally breaking it by concealing the secret; (3) I want the other person to feel the pain because we are not in a good relationship; (4) it will be an embarrassment to the family if the wife or husband can find out and therefore let it remain a secret; and of course the list is endless. If we are to save marriages, we should discard the habit of covering up. The best we can do is to confront those who are leading promiscuous life to change and honour their marriage vows and make sure that they work out things in their marriage.